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THERE IS NOend to a rainbow

Posted by FUBAR at October 31, 2010
Tags: Bad Luck  Family  Health  2010 October  Philosophical

I am past 50 and never had a chance to find love and have a real life.You are taught in Catholic school how great god is, what a fictional characture the so called god is. My problems started early on in my life, some where between 7th and 8th grade my motherwas diagnosed with Ahlzimers, if you don't know what that is your lucky. i had a so called brother wanting to kill my my dad and myself. He would stand outside our kitchen window holding a shotgun and just watch us. he put agun to my head whn he was coming for my dad. Then as my mother got worst my sister and I were basically left to take care of my mother. I guess it was around 12 or 13 years of care we gave my motherbefore she passed. not long after tat my dad was diagnosed with Diabetes,a little late.He had been hiding damaged toes. So they started cutting off parts of his foot and finally up to under his knee.

This timeperiod lasted about another 10years I guess.i would do it all again ,even though it destroyed the better part of which people call your prime years.I could not allow anyone into my life, it would not of been fair.So here ilay over 50, alone 100's of miles from whats left of my familyand i cannot wait for my time to be up.

Asfor my renigion i believe there was a Jesus and the Blessed mother ,but ,i have doubts on a good god. First when the Blessed Mother was so called blessed by the holy spirit and told she would conceive Jesus, I feel that the so called god raped or abducted the blessed mother.The Blessed Mother was not given a choice nor asked about bearing a child, that in any court is pantamount to rape.Do not get me wrong i believe Jesus was and is the truest form of love for mankind. Jesus was so loved his so called father would not answer His pleas during his passion.Jesus was loved and followed by so many that His so called father,god did not help him therefore being part of Jesus's death, a murderer. Any way you look at it god was forgotten and Jesus was loved. A good God would not allow all the suffering and deaths which have and will occur in our lives. that is why I belive this so called God is aligned with the evil one, Satan and untill our Lord Jesus see's this we are all screwed.

As for my life i wait for the end, I too have Diabetes,so what.


i do not believe there is any hope of me getting back to be near my family. I know I will never find love.bottom line , Life Sucks!


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Comments:
By anonymous at 07,Nov,10 09:53

Yes, your life does suck. I am truly sorry for this. It seems like you had a tough lot in life. But, look at it this way, at least you were able to have experiences. Even if they were mostly bad, it's still better than not getting any chance. Besides, it's still not too late to do something meaningful. I suggest volunteering with poor children somewhere. You could bring joy to your life and to theirs'.


By anonymous at 07,Nov,10 17:55

Man you dont know anything about the bible, try actually reading it sometimes. Blessed mother did had a choice and she choose to cocieve Jesus, she wasnt forced into it. And watever Jesus suffered on the passion it was necessary to happen, the point of it was to prove how much he loved us and what he was willing to do in order for us to go to heaven, he was paying for our sins, he never do nothing wrong to deserve that and nevertheless he was crucified, that is how much he loves us. And all the suffering and death that there is in this world that "god allows" is not that god put us in that situation, we brought it into ourselves with our sins. You should try to find the love in god again or at least stop talking shit about things you dont even know.


By anonymous at 07,Nov,10 22:24

I think you did a great thing by taking care of your Mother.You'll be rewarded for that.Now is your time - go out into this big world of ours and do things that you've always wanted to.Change what you want to in yourself.You have a good heart.People see this.Go excersize and get into feeling a better you.It'll improve the quality of your life!


By anonymous at 08,Nov,10 23:12

GOD DOES EXIST AND IF YOURE SUFFERING ITS BECAUSE OF THE DEVIL... LIFE IS FULL OF VIOLENCE AND UPS AND DOWNS AND LOVE AS FOR YOU I FEEL PITY THAT YOU TALK LIKE THAT ABOUT GOD WHEN YOU SHOULD BE HAPPY HE IS SPARING YOUR LIFE YOU SHOULD BE HAPPY YOU ARE LIFE IF IT WASNT BECAUSE RIGHT NOW YOU WOULDNT BE HERE
By anonymous at 30,Nov,10 16:04

you are the living proof that religions are mental illness


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