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wish god would help

Posted by anonymous at February 24, 2011
Tags: Addictions  Drugs  2011 February  Justice  Money

Im 27, I have a 1 yr old with a girl i love & fucked it up with, and my life is fucked. i got addicted to heroin when i was about 17, stayed addicted, went to prison, got out got back addicted, and finally a few years ago kicked with the help of suboxone. i was able to hold down a functioning life and had a son. I was supporting babys mamma/son when a crooked cop pulled me over and threw some dope on me. I had to sit 6mos. in jail but eventually got found not guilty. she & the baby had to move to her moms house 2 hours away. so because of being in jail 6 mos. i've lost my apartment, job, car, girlfriend, and what hurts most my son. also the doctor i was on (who was free) stopped writing subox and now i cant afford to get back on it, so im shooting dope and going through withdraws again. Im broke so im staying with family who dont like me bcause of my past (cant blame em) and they made it clear i cant stay long so the next step is homeless in new orleans. im depressed im a nervouse wreck, i miss my life, i miss my family. i cant even support them i cant even support myself, & now im considering eating a bottle of sleeping pills.


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By anonymous at 17,Mar,11 18:34

there is help...its called God and Narcotics Anonymous. i have seen countless addicts get the help they need, including myself. but you gotta really want it..enough to be willing to work and honest program. just try it...at this point, what do u have to lose? i will be praying for you.
By anonymous at 20,Jul,11 13:52

"NA" is the biggest croc of shit in the world.


By anonymous at 17,Mar,11 20:14

Your right in the thick of it, just think about looking back on this all. Imagine ur son grown up having stable relationships, leave the sleep for when ur dead, not now. X


By at 18,May,11 00:45

My story is pretty damn close to yours. I do not have a wife or kids but I, too lost everything to dope. I once had a beautiful home with a beautiful girl and a car and respect from my family. Now, no car, no girl, nowhere to live, no money,no job,no family support, plenty of restitution to pay, and just started on subs again 3 days ago after a long painful binge.----Or at least until I run out.... I've burned all of my bridges I'm tired of doing dirt and I'm tired of being wasted on dope 24-7. I've gotten super depressed and have spent alot of time at home latley thinking...The best solution I could come up with is to use the "I dont give a fuck anymore" attitude in the right way---to start taking chances and utilizing my devotion to drugs in a positive way for something else like a different profession or another desire...What have I got to lose? It cant get much worse than this can it? I believe at this point the only thing left to do is to start a new life...but this time something enjoyable and progressive. I think the people most likley to succeed are people who already know what not to do in life, like us. Try to block out everything around you and concentrate hard on who you have always desired to become. Really concentrate and take every possible step and before you know it, eventually people from your old life will notice your progress. Dont give up, as painful as it is. If you do it will only make things worse. When you have reached the bottom the only other way to go is up.


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