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why is it so hard to change anything

Posted by A at April 6, 2011
Tags: 2011 April  Friendship  Loneliness  Sexuality

I am 34 years old and I work in a crappy retail job that I am probably about to get fired from. I have almost no friends and the ones I do have live out of state. I left them and moved to a new city to be closer to my family, but turns out we don't get along and I never see them even though we live 10 mins away. I have never had a boyfriend (yes, virgin) because I am almost never attracted to anyone. I only ever Liked one guy and he was gay. I think I am probably Asexual. I try to go out and get better jobs, but I am so uncomfortable with new people that I come across as uptight and timid in interviews. I can't make any friends even though I go out to meetup groups and talk to people. The only people who want anything to do with me are guys who ask me out on dates, but since i am not attracted to them, they leave.
Why is it so hard to make friends?


Votes:


Similar Entries:
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life sucks October 11, 2010
boring sucky life October 29, 2011



New Comment

Comments:
By anonymous at 19,Apr,11 15:00

whats up girl where you stay at?


By anonymous at 19,Apr,11 16:38

Maybe you are asexual, nothing wrong with that. What's your location? I'm 31, female & don't have many friends either although I'm totally normal & cool. It would be cool if we were in the same area.
By anonymous at 02,May,11 19:03

I don't think there is anything wrong with being Asexual, but it is very lonely when you can't make friends and everyone around you just wants to pair up and revolve their lives around a family. I am in NC, where are you?


By anonymous at 28,Apr,11 02:14

I'm in a very similar situation. 33yo male here. Wish there was a way for lonely people like us to meet somehow.

Same with you above me on April 19th
By anonymous at 02,May,11 19:04

Yes, I agree


By anonymous at 28,Apr,11 22:27

I could have written a very similar observation, except I'm male, much older, and have fooled around. Asexual seems to suit me. Don't know if this helps, but people expect more from a relationship, or should I say more from a friendship?
Find someone you are comfortable with, someone like yourself. Never allow yourself to be forced into any situation that doesn't feel right. A good friend is much harder to find than someone who wants to use you for illicit pleasure and then abandons you.


By anonymous at 18,May,11 05:10

It sounds to me like you may lack self esteem especially as you posted with the name A like you wanted a name but couldnt finish it and A was easiest choice. Low self esteem isnt negative many of us are the same, i dont see anything great about myself and so what and low self esteem sometimes comes about because of your deep analytical perceptions of self and others and environment this is a good thing. However it also means that you may be very selective when finding friendship ie somebody similiar not in that you want them to fit a certain criteria but that they share some of the same qualities as yourself. Also you look at your job likes its crap i work in retail and its crap it possesses no positive qualities for me its boring and mundane this just means that you arent ignorant of your surroundngs and probably capable and desire to do more with your life. This also reflects to your family you probably all love each other but you cant meet their conditional demands for this to be possible it may be too awkward hey there are lots of us like this we are just hard to find.


By anonymous at 18,May,11 09:47

You can turn things around. I can't relate to being asexual but I can understand feeling stuck in a crappy job. I was able to break out of it by going to college when I turned 30. I just graduated a few days ago and already have a great job lined up. I think your best bet would be to start improving yourself physically. Join a gym, jogging club, biking club, etc......You'll get exercise and meet people. As you begin improving your body your soul tends to improve as well. You feel better about yourself and your self image improves.


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