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born loser

Posted by anonymous at January 3, 2010
Tags: January 2010  Sexuality

I started realizing I was not normal sexually in junior high especially, my thoughts and compulsive fantasies were private and harmless. I started catching on that it was normal for boys my age (and even younger) to be really into cleavage and boobs and get turned on by stuff like that but I never did I thought that everyone was faking because I felt normal, just not interested at all. I even tried to watch as much soft core porn as I could trying to stimulate myself but nothing.
When the lines between gay and straight were drawn, I did not have my answer because I knew I always liked girls and was nervous around them. I knew I wasnt gay because I dont get off on men. I was more than convinced I was not gay, but liked girls. But normal turn ons like nudity just never got me going. I always knew that keeping my fetishes was a good idea to keep secret even when I was young, but can you imagine being the only one who gets turned on by the idea of women wearing ties, mixed with BDSM? Its hard to stay sane when what I was born with the kind of desires that 99% of people dont share. I couldnt chase girls because the typical hot girl would never truly get me horny. Ive had very few sexual experiences in my 23 years of age simply because I knew the reward was never coming. MY fetishes scare girls away. My guilt about being one of those true weirdos took over. I would explore my fetishes privately doing things no-one would be proud of.
The fact that I was never able to properly be satisfied sexually with another women has greatly shattered my life. a healthy 23 year old should have more to his name than this. They have held me back. And now especially in the last 6-8 months my sex drive is almost gone. The thought of being in a relationship went from making me excited to sad and depressed to feeling nothing at all.
I wouldn't wish my life on anyone so Im not having kids.
p.s. Im numb now. I cant stay bitter anymore.


Votes:


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New Comment

Comments:
By anonymous at 05,Jan,10 02:24

Well i had to look up that BDSM becuase i didnt know what that was, but when i yahooed it and saw the pictures, it kinda did put a scare in me. its just something i wouldnt do or ever experiement with. but who said 99.9% of the world doesnt like this and that youre the only guy who does? if that were true, then why did i just see a dozen pictures of that on the internet and why are many porn sites who support and show things like that? so no dude, there's no way that the world is 99% against you.

youre not in a relationship becuase of THIS? this shoudnt BE the only reason you want to get into a relationship and women are not all about sex. there is more to us then that if guys would just give it a chance!

but if this is something you can't let go, then maybe its for the best that you shouldnt get in a relationship. we all have weird fetishes and we can't be the same and share the same attraction. its just not going to happen. if it makes you feel better, i have a fetish for video game characters, men in tight pants and oddly in trench coats. fetishes are weird, dude.
By anonymous at 07,Dec,10 20:03

hentai Anime with hot wax enough typed


By anonymous at 08,Jan,10 00:53

yo i'm not into that shit but i know ur not the only one whose into it
By anonymous at 10,Jan,10 11:30

Go find yourself a nice hooker. Amateur girls just do not have the experience, knowledge or patience to understand what turns men on. Not all hookers are alike, some are nice, others are lazy. Find yourself an older, experienced hooker who will set you straight. You will know her when she looks at you with a friendly smile. Go for it Tiger!
By anonymous at 07,Dec,10 20:00

not cool hookers are expensive and herpes is everywhere he just needs a fun girl thats normal during the day


By anonymous at 12,Jan,10 04:59

BDSM is by no means an unpopular fetish, in fact it's considered one of the most "main stream" fetishes out there - along with foot fetishes. If you're a nice guy with a good sense of humor I'm sure you'd have no trouble hooking up with an open chick. Approach your fetish with a sense of confidence when approaching your partner like "this is what I'm into...isn't it sexy, you won the jackpot!" instead of "uhm, I'm a freak, youre going to hate me...this is what I like"

A girl that likes you for YOU will be turned on by turning YOU on, duh! If you have troubles with confidence look in the relationship section on Craigslist, and start chatting. Check out the podcast and Author Dan Savage, for some sexual advice. Join some classes you like. Get out there, smile, have fun, your fetish doesnt rule your life or by any means make you a certain type of person - it's just a small,fun part of a great package. Beleive that!

Cheers,

Chantel


By anonymous at 13,Oct,10 19:28

There are SO many women and men into that type of sex. You should not be ashamed of it. You should embrace it! Everyone is different and thats what makes the world so interesting. Use the internet to find others into the stuff your into and im sure there are clubs devoted to that and all kinds of groups of people.
Dont fret, be more proactive in your search!
By anonymous at 07,Dec,10 19:59

yeah!!


By anonymous at 30,Nov,10 13:14

turn from those perversions they are from Satan, trust in the lord Jesus Christ and you shall be set free from your bondage. JESUS IS THE ANSWER TO ALL OF LIFES PROBLEMS
By anonymous at 07,Dec,10 19:58

really your gonna put god in this when you yourself read it go read your bible and leave us alone and go tend to the children of the corn
By anonymous at 04,Jan,12 15:21 Fold Up

oh Gawwwd!


By anonymous at 07,Dec,10 19:57

I like bdsm get over your self and find a good girl or find some swingers near by


By Discount OEM Software at 09,Mar,12 02:23

ZMK2Jk I cannot thank you enough for the blog article.Really looking forward to read more. Will read on...


By Discount OEM Software at 09,Mar,12 02:24

avP0Lr Thank you for your blog article.Much thanks again. Fantastic.


By Quitelady at 27,Mar,12 06:14

adult sex chat rooms are getting more and more oulppar which proves there is a demand for them. The anonymity that the internet affords you means that sex chat between consenting adults becomes an alternative for those who are looking for contact. Live cam sex chat is a 24/7 business and there is always a pretty girl or guy online ready to chat about sex with you


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