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Really, really shit.

Posted by BM at October 17, 2011
Tags: Money  2011 October

41, broke, big house thats half empty because I've sold most of the furniture (no, I cant sell the house, its in negative equity, and the bank is foreclosing anyway - same as on my old place, that I still own & cant F*****g sell; they'll both be gone in a month).
Had a nice car, sold it, got a worse one; done that so much these last 2 years, the next step's a bicycle.
£60000 on credit cards, got made redundant; so did my partner; our business crashed. I opened another, selling antiques on Ebay - went great til Ebay shut it down (and dont get me started on that....). No employment history these last 5 years (except business failures).
Drinking about 80 units a week (its a wonder how I find the money).
Massively fucking depressed, but at least the Prozac nightmares have stopped.
Trapped in a city I fucking hate, full of thick, racist scum. Its a shithole.
My friends all live far away.
cant see an end to it. My head is throbbing constantly. I would give anything just to sleep properly for a night. Bailiffs at the door and on the phone (I dont answer the phone anymore).
Its been going on for years, but my head feels so bad now I just want it to stop, and I dont really care how.


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By anonymous at 02,Dec,11 05:19

I sympatize with you bro im also trapped in a city i hate (Chicago) and my friends are in other states a couple which stop talking to me due to them getting married and stuff. Ebay can be a bitch if you make too much money thru them they get suspicious and if you make little money they take more than half of it. Anyways i hope your doing fine if you want to talk sometime leave a comment. :) Wish you the best!!

By anonymous at 02,Dec,11 07:14

I just give the fuck up. I don't care anymore. Live on the God Damn street or in the woods. Where I live, they are bashing the homeless, laws prohibiting feeding them so, when this fucked up world colapses... I am going to laugh at the greedy rich assholes who caused it if I am still alive.

By anonymous at 03,Dec,11 16:28

I can sympathize with you on the sleep front. I can't remember when I last had a good night's sleep. And even when I take a sleeping pill, I still have insomnia. All we can do is keeping putting one foot in front of the other. I hope things improve for you.

By anonymous at 03,Dec,11 22:48

im only fifteen but i'm pretty understanding. what you need in your life is marijuana. I know it sounds childish coming from a fifteen year old but listen. I have a terrible home life.and i tried alcohol, didn't work. weed completely obliterates any thoughts of depression. It's the one reason i haven't killed myself already. Another plus is that you get super creative and can come up with a solution to almost anything. Oh, one thing i didn't get was how you said " I'm stuck in a city i hate" how are you stuck? why don't you just take the next buss out of there? I recommend California, haha there are quite a bit of homeless people there. you could chill with them for a while. maybe make some bracelets to sale. My mom caught me smoking weed once. She called the cops and i had to go to detention for a month. I live in Utah and the city i live in is said to have the worst detention in the whole state. Well, when i was in there, they had a man come and talk to us about life. He told us a story similar to yours. He ended up on the streets, and that's where he staid for two years. He said it was the happiest he had been in a loooong time. Anyway he started a drum manufacturing company and now he's living a happy life. You'd be surprised where you can find happiness. It doesn't always mean having a big house and a ton of money.

By anonymous at 06,Dec,11 03:08

Suck it up and move on!!!

By j1moneymaker at 17,Dec,11 10:52

hi and hello I understand where you are coming from. I have really been there my self so please believe me what I say and dont take this wrong ok you are a great person you still got alot going for you and you really can change you life but you first have to really want it to change and it begain with you and only you first you have to stop drinking that is just bring you down and put a smile on you face and try to help other person out today give them your smile and see how fast it come back to you be that person friend make there day a better day do something for them. I know you have a lot of problem in your life and I feel for you but in order to change you life you first got to change the thing you are doing it up to you only you can change your own life and I want to give you something that may help cause I belive in you you are a good person please go to this web site it free and they pay daily you can earn from 200 to 500+ a day every day and if you still have the houses I might be able to help you out there and stop foreclosure if you watch the video I will be in touch with you soon please go to

please belive me when I say there is much love here for you and you are a great person. God Bless you have a friend in me Joe

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