It wasn't the same earlier.But after investing about five years in engineering, there's no hope of getting any result.Lost all money and confidence.Got depressed during college coz of my inability to study properly.Took antidepressants and slept 24X7 because of prozac.Quit cold turkey and got permanently impotent at twenty one.Add to that ssri induced rapid cycling bipolar disorder and panic attacks.All I can do is abuse god, then cry to show repentance, then sleep for two hours, then wake up and think of killing others in order to make 'something' out of my life and after making elaborate plans, forget them suddenly and again begin to cry.This happens in a single day.And the fucking cycle continues.I have fallen so ill that I can't even control my thoughts.It seems God has forsaken me and doesn't even want to give me one last chance.Can neither complete nor abandon my education.No scope of any job after working hard for so many years.Everyone looks at me with disgust.Juniors crack jokes over my uselessness.Got no friend obviously.No one wants to be known as 'friend of the loser'.My face has become thoroughly ugly.I have lost all appetite.Cannot go to my home as brothers and sisters are the biggest bastards in my life.They continually despise me.My parents think I shouldn't have been born(and so do I).I think I will become a drug addict in a couple of years.I don't even have the courage to kill myself.I fear I might get used to this treatment by others.wtf | |
If anything, the universe is god. But let's call a universe, a universe, ok?
Break your chains, shed your skin. Life sucks, but that is no reason to believe in a indemonstrable fictional deity.
Trust me, atheism will give you critical thinking skills, and reasoned logic. This makes life a lot easier, as you have no 'god' to blame; your actions are determined by you, and you alone.
But what's the point anyway. Atheism just makes this world even colder. But I know it's the truth, so I face it as such.
God uses the weak, the powerless, the hurt, the poor, and the lonely in GREAT ways. Heres a illustration: A potter will take a helpless, lifeless lump of clay and then knead it and squeeze it until it's soft and pliable. And then when he gets it just right, he takes that piece of clay and he does something called throwing, where he places the clay on a spinning table.
As that clay is placed upon that turning wheel, the potter's hands then begin to pressure the clay and work it until he makes something beautiful out of that old ugly piece of clay.
God is the true master craftsman. He is a potter who is making something beautiful out of every life. He will take the old ugly mistakes and sins and make them into something completely new!
When you truly know God, you can live victoriously! So whatever the ugliness is in your life, be assured that through the blood of Christ, God molds you and makes you into something beautiful! Many people can testify to how God has changed them. Ive never heard of anyone regretting putting their faith in jesus.
Are you saved? God can turn the worst of situations into good! Joeseph was left for dead and put into slavery by his brothers, he was abandonded, afraid, probably thought his life was over. But he trusted God, he then eventually became second in command of Egypt. Without looking into the future it can be hard to be optimistic. If you put your faith with jesus he wont abandon you, he will love you and give you a new life. All you have to do is accept jesus as your lord and savior and ask for forgiveness of your sin, he will wash away all your sin (everyone has sin, i'm not judging you by what I say).
Jesus knows your pain, because he went through all the different pains possible when he was tortured and then nailed to a cross. He layed down his life for me and you, so that we can have eternal life in heaven. All we have to do is accept him as our lord and savior and ask for forgiveness for our sin. Jesus loves you with love that cant be compared, he loves you so much that he died for you. He can change you. He changes people every single day. You can say that one of his job descriptions is "Life Changer". He knows your trouble, he cares for you, and he wants you to know him. He will comfort us when there seems to be no comfort available. He is our friend when everyone else seems to not care, he provides for us when we are without, and he gives us strength when we are weak. He washes away all our sin when we have lived sinfilled lives. He is offering the gift of everlasting life in heaven free of charge, its your choice whether you accept his offer.
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