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I feel miserable everyday now

Posted by anonymous at March 7, 2012
Tags: 2012 March  Money

I can't say that I lived a horrible life. I have a loving family. My parents adored me. They supported me in many things. They always taught me to be the best I can be and follow my dreams. But recently I feel like my dreams are shattered. I feel so lost in life. I live day by day wishing that I would just go to sleep and not wake up. I did OK in high-school...Until I got involved. With dating and lost concentration in college. I followed my boyfriend to his college and failed all my classes there. Now I have loans that I can't even pay. To top it off he broke up with me. Then I met a great Guy who is now my husband. My in laws love me and support me. But the life style here is so different. When I first moved in with my In-Laws, I enjoyed it. Then I found out I got pregnant. I have no job and no money. My husband also quit his job. We have been bumming around my In-Laws...feeling lost. I feel like a failure because I didn't listen to my parents. I don't finished school and get a career first. My husband never went to college either. Now I feel like life is just an endless cycle of working for money to pay bills. Its not good enough for me. I just want to die. To top it off...I am 3 months pregnant. I can't imagine being a good mother. It's too hard. I fantasize about killing myself everyday. No money. No insurance. No goals. No passion. Just dull and tired.


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