I'm 26, and still working a shitty entry-level job as a security guard. I did one year of college, under a 'general studies' program, thinking I'd take a bit of everything and find something to interest me, but nothing did... so I left and figured I'd work a job for a year or so, then come back when I figured out my direction. This would keep me from building up more student loans to go absolutely nowhere. I took a job in security that paid pretty well, so I took out a lease on a car and life was sweet. Then the recession hit... I missed a bunch of car payments, and the car got reposessed, I missed so many student loans it went into collections and now the Canadian equivilent of the IRS is on my ass. I'm over $20,000 in debt, but in todays job market I had to take a position that barely pays enough to cover my monthly bills, let alone dig myself out of debt.
To make matters worse, I'm already afflicted with high blood pressure and a possible heart condition I can't seem to nail down, but I can't even find an ongoing family doctor, which means I have to keep using walk-in clinics that don't even want to do the tests to figure out what's wrong with me, they just want to write a prescription for a blood pressure medication and kick me out the door.
I also have next to no real friends, no love life to speak of at all, and the only two real friends I DO have work on the oil rigs, so they're only in town one week out of 5, during which time they have to catch up with TONS of people, so I never see them, and spend most of my "free time" sitting in front of the TV watching time pass me by and waiting for it all to end.
I want to go back to school and finish my education so I can get a better job that will help me dig out of this slump, but I can't get financed anymore cause of my previous student debt - so basically I can't make money without an education, but I can't get an education without money, which only FURTHER hurts my social life (who wants to date a guy going into his late 20s still renting rooms in other people's houses, working a shitty job that makes just over minimum wage, who has to take the bus to get anywhere?) and causes FURTHER stress, which only wreaks further havoc on my health.
Life is just one big cycle of one shitty break making another shitty break worse, and I can't even remember the last time anything good happened to me. I still have so much of my life ahead of me, but at this point I don't know if I can stand to do this that much longer. | |
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