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Posted by Tanishia Smith at February 13, 2013
Tags: Feb2013

My daughter died on 1-6-2013 from a bad asthma attack. I picked her up from daycare on my moms birthday. We were on our way to my sisters house to pick her up for the party when my daughter said she couldnt breathe. I thought it was just another acute asthma attack so i gave her some puffs of her inhaler. But she kept saying mom i really cant breathe. This had happened before so I rushed to my sisters house (I ran every light on the street). I made it there and my daughter kept saying I cant breathe. We gave her the breathing machine and called 911. She collapsed 5 minutes later and started foaming at the mouth. I had no idea she was dieing. My sister did C.P.R until the ambulance arrived. It took them forever to get there we kept calling and calling. When they arrived they tried to save her but my baby died. I still cant beleive it. It feels like a knife cut my heart open. It hurts. I feel so guilty because I didnt save my baby. I wish everyday I would have driven to the hospital. But the hospital was twenty minutes away. My daughter was only 9 years old. No one can beleive it. I have two other kids and most days I hate waking up. I cry all day it feels like im having a heartache. I wish my baby was still here. I think about taking my own life. I dont know what to do.


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Comments:
By anonymous at 23,Jun,13 22:19

Im so sorry. Every parent has made the kind of decision you did that day. You didnt know. I hope you can forgive yourself someday and cherishbthe good memories of your little angel.


By anonymous at 04,Jul,13 00:01

You did the best you could. Sometimes even little babies die the very day they are born. We do not have power over life and death. You can't blame yourself for this, it was not in your hands. Love ALL your kids. She is watching over you.


By anonymous at 04,Jul,13 17:02

It sounds like you made the best decision you could! How were you to know how bad her asthma attack would be? You sound like an amazing mom, please don't blame yourself. What a horrible, unthinkable outcome. I hope you find peace.


By Davidmartin at 22,Jul,13 09:19

I suffer from asthma as in my childhood and on rare occasions of my adulthood. There are certain things that could trigger asthma and I would like point out:

-Pet fur or feathers, pet urine, saliva and dander.
-House-dust mites.
-Cockroach waste and decomposing carcass.
-Mold and mildew spores. (leaking plumbing, leaking roof, etc.)
-Tobacco smoke and wood smoke.
-Perfumes, hairsprays, scented lotions, and cologne.
-Air fresheners, incense sticks and scented candles.
-Cleaning solutions, pesticides and paint fumes.
-Pollen from trees, grasses, and weeds.
-Mold and mildew spores. (wet rotting leaves on the ground, molded wall in humid indoor)
-Changes in humidity. (high humidity)
-Exposure to cold air or hot humid air.
Industrial emissions, vehicle or truck exhaust, and other air pollutants such as Coal Dust.
Ozone. (avoid being out in the hottest part of the day during the summer months)

To parents out there, learn this list by heart, as one of them may turn out to be the one that stops your child from breathing one day. Make sure you avoid your child from being exposed to any of those for as much as possible.
By broken at 25,Jul,13 01:22

You forgot 'hobo choad.' GBCS chokes on it all the time.


By anonymous at 30,Jul,13 03:42

Yeah, you killed your kid. Any person with fucking common sense would go to the hospital. Your child put her life and trust in your hands, and you failed her.
By anonymous at 31,Jul,13 02:19

thats a horrible thing to say you retard. didnt you read the entire story? she didnt kill the kid. it was an accident! i feel terribly ashamed for your rude comment!
By anonymous at 20,Aug,13 01:16 Fold Up

I wrote this blog 7 months ago. One month after my daughter passed. And the pain is still there it hurts. I am learning to better cope with it and understand it all. Many nights i have laid in bed and blamed myself for her death. I thought if i did this or did that she would still be here. I even tried to commit suicide over the guilt. But i know now that i dont have control over life and death. I did the best i could that day and i can either spend the rest of my life in guilt or forgive myself and live for my other two kids who need me. I pray for someone as ignorant as you. I will cherish my daughters memories in my heart and i will love her until the day we reunite in heaven. If i believed your dumb comments. I would be stooping to your level. I just hope and pray u never lose anyone as dear to you as my daughter was to me.
By anonymous at 23,Aug,13 18:10 Fold Up

your a f-ing prick that has to humiliate someone to get it up.

Oh yeah you probably voted for hussein obama too......
By anonymous at 05,Sep,13 14:48

Haha, what the fuck does Obama have to do with this? At ALL?

You insult someone for being a dick who is impotent unless he insults and hurts someone. Then, you proceed to try to insult and hurt someone.

Hypocrisy much?

Oh yeah you probably stuck your dick inside of a goat too...

(see what I did there?)
By anonymous at 18,Sep,13 05:37

This is supposed to be a heartfelt story that people read and learn from, why are you all pointing fingers on whose fault it is...? Every mother loves her children and she obviously loves her daughter enough to mourn for her and write on a dodgy website, so cut her some slack!!


By anonymous at 09,Aug,13 15:08

Jesus loves you, just hold on to him


By Rob Roy at 19,Sep,13 12:14

Fuck, life's a bitch. I'm so sad reading this story. I wish you have better life, you deserve it ...
By anonymous at 22,Sep,13 09:32

I agree


By anonymous at 25,Oct,13 17:16

So sad. My daughter has recently found out she has asthma. Reading your story and feeling your pain has made me realise exactly how serious asthma is. Thank you for sharing. I lost a child(still born) and my world crumbled, but I now have 3 lovely kids and I have learnt to live with the hole that has been left. I know it seems hard for you now.. The pain is fresh, but time does heal, I promise. Hang in there for your other kids. God bless


By anonymous at 29,Oct,13 03:48

28 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” Matthew 11:28


By anonymous at 30,Oct,13 00:38

Fuck god's plan..... I would lose it if my children were taken away from me............no parent should have to ever out live their child. I wish I could reach out to you....my heart burns for your lose....


By crorkservice at 03,Sep,15 08:15

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