| | Posted by anonymous at August 21, 2011 |
I just found out that the reason it's so hard for me to do anything, is due to me not having sufficient amounts of Dopamine in my brain. To do anything requires a huge effort. So much that I get headaches and become exhausted. I can't afford medication, and I watch my life and opportunities just waste away; I feel trapped. I can't type anymore |
| | Posted by anonymous at August 21, 2011 |
My life started out as an unwanted baby and given up for adoption after two foster homes. From kindergarden to 12th grade I was taunted and teased and tortured everyday for having a lazy eye. At 15 was diagnosed with major depression. I was date raped 16. I got married at 18 to someone I thought loved me and was physically and emotionally abusive to me for 20 years, I tried to leave and couldn't make it financially on my own with two kids. Finally divorced him and live at poverty level struggling financially and emotionally and can't afford to live. Then, I thought I met a nice guy and all he did was take advantage of me and pick at me everyday about EVERYTHING. My two adult kids live with me and have made every mistake with their lives and their dad never lends me a hand. I wake up everyday wondering "why am I still alive"? I am in my 40's and can't get a decent job and I only make .50 cents more than minimum wage and have been looking for another job for a year now and can't even get an interview, no one in my life that cares, my parents both died of cancer. My kids treat me like I am nothing and no one. I want to die everyday, It is really sad when you hear about some great person, some humanitarian, someone who was a hero, or had it all in their life and they die. They are the one's that had something to live for, I feel useless, uneducated, pointless, worthless, unappreciated, used, mislead, and I have never felt I should have even been born in the first place. I must be really the most pathetic person to wish everyday for death. |
| | Posted by Suicide Season at August 21, 2011 |
I have been abused and and hated my whole life
disapointed and disapointed anything i did or wanted turned out bad
friends yeh they where great i am 16 and i am from holland and what they say about holland is true atleast for me i was a generous cunt who always let anyone in if you where my friend
want too sleep over? sure you wanna stay for dinner? go ahead!
im gonna make this very short before i make this story any longer
my life fails and my final year in high school begins tomorrow.
wish me luck |
| | Posted by hate teen age at August 21, 2011 |
Well......when i was a kid i lived with my mom and young brother, then she passed away, so i had to move with my dad, and my brother with his. That sucked as i didnt really know my dad well and i was kinda scared of him, and not being able to see my young brother depressed so bad. Things got worse when i had to change high school, had to move out from my town, leave my friends, my house..absolutely everything was taken from me. so in the new high school i really didnt get along with hardly anybody, i just had 1 very good friend and still today he is my best friend, so many schoolmates laughed about me, bullied me, make jokes about me, the most cruel things u can imagine to happen to you in high school, they did happen to me. Now im much older, but i hate them all, i cants stop thinking about those who did these things to me that still today feels like it was yesterday, i cant seem to escape from that dark long period of my life, i really have trouble in being sociable, allways in tension with ppl, cant take very good care of myself, and self esteem is not precisely good..i wish i could go back and defend myself and put things where there had to be at that time, now they all probably forgot about that, but i really hate them, i really wish and hope life will put everyone in their deserved place, and those who make others suffer like they did to me, will get what they deserve, as bad as it can be. hope the sentence 'what goes around, comes around' is real.
Peace |
| | Posted by loser teen at August 20, 2011 |
I am currently 17 years old and life has been fucked ever since i started High School. It just seems like everything bad that could happen to me just did and all so quick. I have friends and and 2 best friends in particular i can tell anything to. But besides that it just seems life has screwed me. to begin with my dad is an alcoholic and on top of that he ignores me and my sister, and the only time he has something to say is when he is drunk( he wanted to fight me once) ridiculous!
Another thing is i am a social outcast at school i thought i was going to be popular and have a hot girlfriend or something, bu no life delivered the sour unpleasant effect i have on choosing girls, i always choose the ones that like me for being super nice and then i think i have them and then they run off with some tool who has a lot of friends and has a douchebag personality. I'm sick of it i have never even kissed a girl its so pathetic, i am constantly teased for it as well.
The last thing i can say is that in school i attract the biggest assholes and i dont even say things to people or bother them and somehow some asshole tool finds me sees that i am a nerd because i decide to read a damn book and then takes it away a midst me reading it or trying to get a group to start teasing me i am sick of it, i just wish one day things would just change and be different.
I am 17 and all i have to say is Life sucks
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| | Posted by lonely gamer at August 20, 2011 |
i am 17 and i'm a hermit really i stay in my house and just play video games all day and its just doesnt cut it. i constantly think about how much my life sucks and how my family problems always stack up, like how my father is an alcoholic and doesnt even acknowledge my existence.i dont have a girlfriend which most people around me do and it bothers me, i mean i have never even had a girlfriend to top it all off,it just sucks, never kissed one, nothing. then when i am at school i just stay quiet and people constantly make fun of me, i just want to get away from it all, but there's nothing i can do to escape it all. i just wish something good would happen to me for once |
| | Posted by anon at August 20, 2011 |
Just very depressed and feel like I don't know where I am going these days. I was engaged to be married to a man who became very abusive. We ended up having a child together and when my son was 2 months old, he attacked me for the last time and I left him. Haven't seen my ex since (my son is 5 1/2 now). My restraining order just expired after 5 years and I just filed for full custody and restricted visitations (not that he'd ever be interested in seeing his own son, but just in case). My baby boy is my life. I love him so much and probably could not breathe without him. Being single, I discovered a lot about myself and found out I enjoy the company of a woman much more than the company of a man (no bible verses or hate comments please..just want to vent so if you hate gays, just leave me alone please). I got involved with a woman who was wonderful with my son and we were together for 2 1/2 years. One problem, though. She was too much of a drinker and eventually, I had to cut her loose. She was there for my son and I so much and I miss her terribly, but I can't have that kind of behavior around my son. It also led me to drink more, which I needed to stop right away.
I have a decent job and have been going to school since 2009 for my BS in Business at the University of Phoenix. I just see negative publicity about the school and I fear that I won't find anything once I graduate next year. I've truly busted my ass in school and have achieved nothing but A's and B's a... |
| | Posted by anonymous at August 20, 2011 |
Im 18 years old, since i was liltle i knew life was hard and that it would suck but i never knew how much? I feel very lonely, and all the things i thought real in my life are not. It only takes a few miles to know who is really your friend and who's not. I recently graduated from high school, so many good moments i lived there. I had so many "friends", people that supposely cared about me. My family dicided to move, now im in a place where i have no firends.The one's that claimed bein my friends dont even bother callin nor askin if im dead or alive. It really hurts to see how they are makin their life wiithout me. i guess thats just part of life but it really bothers me. When they needed me i was always there to help them or at least listen to all their problems. Now i found myself lonely and miserable, wondering if all this is worth it or not? |
| | Posted by Everything is shit. at August 19, 2011 |
The title explains it all, huge family that all hates eachother, ravaged by drugs and alcohol. My dads so unbelievably insensitive and critical of everything I do I just want the man to tell me he's proud of me, he never has once. But do I deserve it? No, I want it because I'm selfish. I'm a fuckin' loser. I dropped out because I'm pathetic and couldn't make it through a horribly simple and dumbed down education system. A girlfriend? Forget it, I am selfish in that area too, just because I'm hideous doesn't mean I am attracted to someone else who is hideous. I've got a small dick, and I'm meek to all tits.
But wait, there's more!
Aside from me living with 9 people and having absolutely 0 relationship with any of them, I also lost my job because I'm a miserable failure in that area too. The closest thing I had to happiness was fuckin' around behind my back and when I caught her the solution was to tell me how shit I was.
News flash, you dumb cunt, I KNOW HOW SHIT I AM. Just because a guy is a worthless loser doesn't mean you should creep around behind his back, leave the guy, fuck!! It's not like I had anything to offer her, she had nothing to lose, the only thing she wanted from me was whatever little cash I could scrounge up at my last shit job, she gave good dome though.
Where do you go from here, too old to be in your parents house, out of work with no education. Trying to find another job and get the hell out of this state but it isn't exactly working out in my favor.
I am honest to god considering stuffing a backpack with clothes and forking up the little cash I have left on a bus ticket, to start anew. Thoughts? |
| | Posted by Nel at August 19, 2011 |
I have 4 kids a addict boyfriend and cant find a job. The windshield in my car is broke my car insurance just went up and I got cancelled and got a 150 dollar fine from the mva for having a 9 hour lapse Oh yeah and to top it off I live with my boyfriend and my husband that I left 2 years ago woo hoo shit is great. And I am effin broke |
| | Posted by Anonamous at August 19, 2011 |
I have a crap life, why? Coz it sucks. I have been through so many good times back in my country, but ever since I came to Australia my life started to get worse. When I came here I was 11 (now I am 17), and I was the daily target for everyone to have a go at bagging…. I was made fun of by the whole school because my name was pronounced differently so it sounded like a female name (none of them bothered to even listen to my corrections). Then came 2 other guys named Leslie and Ashley…. guess what? Their skin colour was not brown, they spoke good english, therefore they were not made fun of…. not one bit. This bullying happened for about 5 years… in which time I had planned to kill myself more than 100 times. Why didn’t I do it then? Well I keep thinking of my parents. My cousin committed suicide last month, he was suffering from depression. My mum cried so much, and my dad was disgusted. Now I am not sure what to do…. I am having so much trouble coping with everything and trying to live in this house where I am despised and demoralised all the time.
Ok, I will detail you everything if you believe that is no reason to die.
-I am short for my age (5ft 7inch exactly)
-I am not the type of person anyone would be interested in.
-I love video games, and want to be a video game developer….. too bad for me I can’t because my parents don’t want me to be that and they want me to be a doctor ( I am not smart ).
-I have a younger brother who swears at me, and talk... |
| | Posted by anamika at August 19, 2011 |
My Life...what do i say i am little slow that means i am not bad compared to others but my parents never knew that ..my mom use to think that i am a bad luck in her life she use to scold me always for that , still when i remind about those scolding’s there are Tears in my eyes when I was in school i never had friends @ all i hardly use to speak with people. Whenever there was a discussion about any Trip or Picnic in my class i never use to listen i was doing my job silently ..bse i knew that i will never get permission from my mom & i never asked them also I never participated in any events in my school or college life but I use to help my sister in it & she has won many prizes also but its all against to my mom ‘s now I am 27 & whenever I sung any song my colleague asks me why didn’t i became a singer???? Hmmmm that’s life & I was alone So…. I have a brother also who is living his life as a king I am happy for him I love him a lot he had got everything he wanted from the childhood may be he had carried that Luck with him from god here I am not complaining against anyone for anything as its life given to me by God ...but still i never gave up anything i did my BSC Comp.Sc & a Post graduation Diploma degree in Comp Appl. Graduation with 1st class marks I love my mom only for the support she gave me in my Education nothing else. I came to a city Called BANGALORE in Sep 2006 where people come with lots of dreams & dreams & dreams but I didn’t had any dream I just wanted... |
| | Posted by chihuahua at August 19, 2011 |
I hate this world I am so angry at every person and I hate myself so much. I got married out of highschool, had a family, raised two kids, the entire 21 years I was alone married but alone emotionally and parenting definately all alone, I never worked, he took care of the money. I wasnt allowed to know anything. My grandmother handed me a few dollars every week, month. I was just used to it I had no clue how the world worked all I did was maintain a house and raise kids and baby sit for relatives but i had nothing of my own. My husband refused to sleep in our bed, he always slept in his office on the couch. He wouldnt eat at the dinner table he would deliberatley avoid it. He wouldnt attend the kids after school sports or plays or band performances, every now and then he would come to one but I really did it all. Once the kids became close to 18 I panicked I got a job at walmart and then I left my husband and I soon found out I couldnt survive on my own so I tried to kill myself. My son had gotten his girlfriend pregnant she was getting ready to have my first grandson and I really couldnt stand this girl, my instincts told me she was using my son. My daughter was only 16 but she decided to stay with her dad so she could finish at her school she didnt want to move to another school district. I understood that so I didnt force it but it definately totally changed our relationship and to this day we are not close like I always thought we would be. My son got into drugs and a... |
| | Posted by teenage kid at August 19, 2011 |
J'ai quinze (15) ans (years) My whole life my mother's lied to me about everything
(literally) Ive gotten so frustrated angered and depressed my whole life that i have outbursts of uncontrollable rage; broke 2 of my phones, 2 my laptops and my ipod over last 5 months. Plus ive barely talked 2 my father my whole life eventhough we live in the same house (my parents are together without problems), only tym i eve talk 2 him is when he lectures me.
Im introvert but im smart, especially in math, physics and i program computers.
been wanting to kill myself last 12 months and my mother still doesn't listen 2 anything I say, takes me like a joke.
on top of that because my mum is unemployed and my dad only has $50k in his account, and i hav 2 brothers, my plans 2 go 2 mit or cornell, and escape this life are over. gonna hav 2 endure hell for the rest of my life.
Hated both my parents since i was 10 and still hav 3 more years of looking at their faces |
| | Posted by Animas at August 18, 2011 |
My life sucks. I had a normal life growing up until I recently found out that i had repressed memories of my older brother beating me, abusing me, and attempting to kill me. He acts normal but lately at night I've getting my memories back and all of them are visions and sounds of my older brother doing things to me that I don't remember. I went to a therapist and he told me that I might have repressed memories of my older brother and that the anger and fear I have from him is because of the things he's done to me. So all of my emotions I feel towards my older brother and myself is from him. he's the one who makes me try and kill myself multiple times and he's the one who makes me want to kill him and anyone who acts like him. It's all his fault that I couldn't have a normal relationship with my family and friends and he's the reason I'm anti-social. My life sucks and I want to kill him and after that kill myself. |
untitled story|
| Posted by Thomas at August 18, 2011 |
I'm almost 21 and for the most part my life has been miserable. Both my parents being incarserated in and out ever since I can remember. I had to raise myself pretty much. I was born with this rare deformedy. It cause the facial to be prylize, which means no facial expressions. Some ppl have trouble understanding my speech, since I can't form words with my lips. The condition also causes the bones to be extremely classified, causing me to be both hearing and visually impaired. Growing up I was always made fun of. In my teen years. It still continued I told a girl I liked her and she flipped out. I never really had any girl friends. I have a number of friends but none really get me. Unfortienently due to my up bringging I have became angry and cynical. lost count of times I thought of sulicide now it's just a normal occurrence. I feel so alone I can't share my feeling without being judged I can't connect with anyone. Here's the perfect example, the monster off of frankinstein. A good guy but no one accepted because he was a rech. |
| | Posted by anonymous at August 18, 2011 |
i'm a boy of 16, pretty young to say that MY LIFE SUCKS FUCKING HARD
i'm having a decease, i have a phobia of the outside world, never had a gf, never had sexual experience, no hugs or kisses, i'm not the best looking or baddest looking, i think ill die as a virgin, i don't wanna wham some whore/slut
i just jack off everytime i'm alone
due to my decease i can't get a job so no money
i have like 0-1 zero friends, the only thing i do is stuck at my computer chair like glue..
at school i'm a loner, people bully me, think that i'm a weirdo, and i don't belong to anywhere
don't get me wrong i look normall like anyone but i feel that i'm just different
i don't realy have a close bond with family so i can't realy rely on them
i suck at school, suck at everything, i have no talents, life sucks without
having a gf, i fail, you think this is nothing but when you would stand inside my shoes you would understand
the world is hell,
ive done self harm, ive been controlled by people they used me
i smoke swishers overdose it till i can't even stand up and faint
i always stay at home, doing nothing and thinking about it's the same day again
how long with this keep on going?
i have depressions almost everyday, when bed time i can't sleep becouse there is too much going on, i cry like a whimpy kid to sleep, and when i sleep i hope i never wake up becouse in my dreams it's my wonderland where I CAN MAKE THINGS HAPPEN
FUCK! GODDAMNIT!!
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| | Posted by BitterSweet at August 18, 2011 |
I try so hard to make a better person of myself but it doesnt seem to work.Its been almost 2 years now jobless.I cant afford anything and rely on my family.Its so embarrassing.I dont know what I did wrong.There are evil and sinister people that get what they want and I dont understand why they get it so easy.I wish to sleep and never wake up. |
| | Posted by Itachi Uchiha at August 18, 2011 |
I'm 24 but younger inside I'm disable since I was born I feel my life suck because I was abandon when I was 4 use abuse and more ever since I was 6 I been trying to run away but have nowhere to go was always force to clean the big back yard full of junk and force to stand in the corner of the wall with my hands up while holding a green flour bucket half full of flour if my hands go down I get more hours while so call family but they are no family to me watch tv and when I though I had friends they did nothing but talk behind my back and betrayed me so after that I didn't have anyone only true friend I ever had was video game only thing that didn't make fun of me betray me and more yes I know video game is not a friend all I ever wanted was a real family that would love me and care about me and a girlfriend that would really love me and care about me plus have some really good friends too but it never came true right now I'm with blood family but no family of mine they are no good type of people never listen to what I say and never give me the help I need or want I'm stuck here in this house 24 hour a day mostly in my room lonely and sad and depress a lot I don't really have anyone to talk to and can't go out and do things I want to because they wont let me and through all the pain and suffering I'm going through I even though of ending myself but I didn't because I'm scared and want to live but wish things were not like this so I keep living day by day with nothing but pain sadness depressing and no one to help me or talk to me :( |
| | Posted by Manny at August 18, 2011 |
am 19 years old i live with my parents ...... mom and dad always treat me very bad they hold the belt and they hit me with it everywhere..... i have some very good friends but they won't last for me .... i wana get something bright out of this life ive been as i am since i was a kid ...thats all i remember mom and dad hiting me no good days my dad keeps on fighting with my mom and running away and mom keeps on screaming at me because she wants to get her madness out on me am going to college but very scared because mom keeps on telling me if u fail we won't have money ..... besides she doesn't give me anymoney .... i sometimes have to get 50 cents and so to eat atleast i only eat 1 small burgure aday ..... am very skinny .....
NO MONEY ... NO FOOD...... NO FRIENDS.....NO PARENTS ......
I WANA DIE |
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