I dont know what to do anymore. I'm only 16 and already I feel like there is no future for me. My dad who was abusive tried to kill me when i was still in my moms womb,he was abusive to me after I was born and when he left things gotsome what better but not quite. And then things always got worse at school. I have ben bullied and been fighting people and always in trouble all the way up til now. I have tried suiciding 3 times once by hanging myself, the second by trying to get run over and the third by pills. I have tried getting a girlfriend cuz that seems to be the only thing that will make it bettr but nobody is interested. I try putting myself out there but nobody ever looks interested and I've even tried approaching women and trying to get them interested in me with no results. Ive only dated 4 times and 2 of them were huge mistakes andone only dated me for a week and left me for her ex boyfriend. And after she broke up with him we started getting close again and starting to love each other again, I even stood out intl the rain soaked from my head to my feet for 2 weeks to tell her i love her and give her a necklace and later i found out she ran off with her ex again. So I've had a poor childhood and a terrible school life and an even worse dating life so it suks all the way around for me but everyone else i see that says they have a terrible life they either get laid a lot or they have a wonderful girlfriend or they have lots of friends. So wheres my luck where is any ood in my life cuz I have never been happy almost never and I am getting tired of it so much and the worst part about it is I'm a virgin and cant do anything about it cuz i live in the middle of nowhere and my mom doesnt trust me with a car and every day i have to hear a bunch of other people brag about how good sex is and how they are getting fucked by their girlfriend and it hurts so bad I can barely watch porn anymore cuz it reminds me of what I fell like I'll never have is a girlfriend and sex. | |
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Somehow in my early 20s I lost the believe in relationship and started the habit of paying for women in brothels of what are legal in my country.
All I want and see in sexy women are just the act of mating, to hell with the friend first then sex later shit. Getting a girl friend who is like minded while one has a fuck-up childhood like mine and yours is never mean to happen. My luck was limited and now I see the truth, fuck it, I am paying.
1st, there is nothing wrong with being a virgin!
2nd, it's been my experience that the ones that do the MOST talking are the ones that are having ZERO sex!!!
3rd, stop trying to find a girlfriend and just BE a FRIEND! Most girls your age would rather have a FRIEND they trust than a boyfriend that will break their hearts!!
Hang in there, being a teenager is very tough these days!!!
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