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depressed

Posted by beenthiswayallmylife at February 16, 2012
Tags: Anxiety  2012 February

i have had anxiety and depression for 10 years. for the past five months its been worse than ever. i stay in my room even though i have a more loving family than anyone i have ever known. they have helped me through everything including taking me to doctors out of state, putting me in rehab facilities, and i have taken every medicine under the sun for anxiety, depression, bi-polar, schitzophrenia, etc. they hurt more than they deserve to over this and i cant stand putting them through this pain. but after all the attempts at finding something to fix this nothing has worked. so i feel hopeless. i dont believe in anything working anymore to relieve this pain. i wish my family didnt love me so much so i wouldnt feel so guilty. i love them more than anything and i suffer because of the pain i put them through. but i feel like the bad guy all the time because now they feel i am giving up because i wont go for more help. but what else is there that can possibly help? this is the worst pain and it is never ending. i feel tortured from the minute i wake up until the minute i go to sleep. i just need to get my thoughts out there to someone who will listen because talking to my family about it just hurts them more and i dont want to hurt them. i get angry at times too because they tell me i am giving up because i wont seek further help. but like i said i dont believe in the help anymore. anyone in a similar situation lke me?


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Similar Entries:
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New Comment

Comments:
By anonymous at 25,Feb,12 14:32

I know what you are going through. I have tried everything under the sun to "fix" myself, but it is a cycle of drug use to calm our fragile nerves and then getting off of them. Depression is something that we can help ourselves with....if you are feeling tortured day and night, then you are being tortured. Something is keeping you in this state of angst. I don't know your circumstances, however, it does sound like our system has failed you and you are correct in your judgement not to believe in the help.....however, you cannot give up on yourself and your well being..... Do you pray, meditate, chant or otherwise? Buddhist chanting helps me. www.sgi-usa.org.... go online and find someone close to you who practices this chanting...the sound of the chanting helps clear your head and your heart..... Trust and believe that you are important and you matter. You need help because feeling tortured is a horrible way to live.... Love and light to you and your family.


By anonymous at 26,Feb,12 15:17

I have the same problem. Don't worry it can be cured with CBT.


By anonymous at 27,Feb,12 23:15

Take clonazepam they work reall y I take them


By anonymous at 29,Feb,12 19:04

i just want to say thank you to the three of you for listening and taking the time to respond...maybe i should try the meditation...can you tell me what cbt and clonazepam are? thanks so much...i truly mean it


By at 02,Mar,12 13:39

CBT - Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, google it and checmout the wikipedia page

I believe this is what they were refering to? Looks like a good idea, maybe something I should try, because I really wanna stay away from drugs myself. It's so tough, but deep down I know it's all in my head... it comes and goes, I'm lucky that every once in a while my head is clear and I'm happy and everything makes sense, I gotta get that feeling back...


By pro link building at 24,Sep,13 17:34

os3Qty Appreciate you sharing, great post.Much thanks again. Much obliged.


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